


The hardest thing ever.

by dropaholic



Category: Men's Football RPF
Genre: Angst, It gets cute i promise, Julian loves Presnel so much, Kinda, M/M, Paris Saint-Germain F.C.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-28
Updated: 2019-05-28
Packaged: 2020-02-27 10:34:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18737293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dropaholic/pseuds/dropaholic
Summary: Julian has to leave Paris and he needs to tell Presnel. This might be the most difficult thing he has ever done.





	The hardest thing ever.

Julian squeezed his eyes shut and exhaled deeply. This was possibly going to be the hardest thing he has ever done. Maybe this was going to be the final thing that crushed him into tiny little pieces. After everything he's been through in his life, maybe that talk was going to be it. He grimaced on that thought, his mouth twisting almost painfully.  
When he finally opened his eyes again, he immediately caught Presnel's gaze. The soft but concerned look of the defender, his head slightly tilted to the side patiently waiting for the German to start talking. Julian sighed again, shortly this time, to give himself some kind of confidence.

" I have to leave. " He said abruptly, lowering his gaze as soon as the words got out of his mouth. Just so he wouldn't have to stare in Presnel's confused eyes.

" What do you mean, Drax ? Leave ? To go where ? " Asked Presnel all at once not leaving a chance for Julian to actually answer his numerous questions.

" I'm leaving Paris. The club. I wasn't that good this season you know and the club might actually want to sell me. I still don't know where, but- " Julian paused after finally looking back at Presnel, who looked startled and agape. " But I have to leave. " He finally completed his sentence.

" No. " Firmly stated Presnel while shaking his head in disapproval. " You won't Julian. "

He called him by his name, no Drax, no Jules, no babe. Just Julian. A shiver ran down his spine at that.

" Pres, I have to face that option. " Julian almost whispered, not trusting his voice anymore. He slowly reached for Presnel's chin with the tip of his fingers, ultimately catching it between his thumb and his forefinger. As he got significantly closer to Presnel, Julian's hand settled on his teammate's cheek. " Don't worry Pres, we can still text each other, facetime, even see each other on breaks. It's going to be fine. "

Julian caressed his friend's cheek gently with his thumb, said friend who didn't even mind giving him any kind of answer. If he was being honest with himself, it felt weird at first being the one to initiate some kind of intimacy between the pair. Usually Presnel was the one doing all of that, not him. But it felt good. His gaze locked with Presnel's once again, his eyes glowing more and more with tears as the seconds went by. If Presnel cried just now, Julian was going to as well and there's no promises he might stop anytime soon.

" I know it won't be the same as being teammates, but- " Started Julian again quietly trying his best to ignore Presnel's sniffing. He could lose it anytime soon. " But we can still be friends. " Julian continued his voice slightly cracking at the end of his sentence. " You know just as much as I do how it works in our world. People come and go but you just have to deal with it. " Julian managed to pull all that out of himself without even breathing once.

Presnel sniffed again as he leaned his head more into Julian's palm.

" But you're not just 'people', you're Julian. " Said Presnel's voice lower than his usually loud and extravagant self. " My Julian. " He added. And it instantly made Julian feel like his heart burst out of his chest. If he wasn't already madly crushing on his friend he might of had fallen in love with him right then and there.

Julian couldn't give an answer to that, he couldn't give a proper response that wouldn't involve a year long monologue about how he fell head over heals in love with the man in front of him. His hand still awkwardly pressing against Presnel's head felt like it was suddenly heating up to the point of burning the palm of his hand. He swiftly pulled his hand back and slightly moved back at the same time. And for some reason Presnel did not agree on that move as he quickly moved himself back in Julian's personal space, so close that he could feel and hear his breath. Presnel quickly but softly wrapped himself around Julian like a small child would, his arms around Julian's neck and his head resting on the crook of his neck. Julian flinched slightly at that move, surprised. But softly wrapped his own arms around Presnel's torso, his eyes fluttering shut at the same time.

" I'll miss you. " Presnel whispered after what felt like a year against Julian skin, his lips brushing on the thin skin of his neck. Julian breathed in at that, deeply. Maybe passing out now, in Presnel's arms would be a good thing, he thought. Maybe. He wanted to stay like that forever, right there, in the middle of this room.

" I'll miss you too. " Murmured Julian in response, close to Presnel's hear. Their hearts beating loud against each other, so loud he wasn't sure his friend actually heard him.

After a while, maybe a minute, or five, Presnel finally detached himself from Julian's arms and the midfielder could clearly see the salty pearls hanging dangerously on the side of his friend's eyes. He swiftly with his thumb wiped them away, as if it could make both of their sadness go away as well.

" Julian, you deserve the best, you know. " Started Presnel all of a sudden, Julian had never seen him be this serious, ever. " You're an amazing player and I know you still have a lot of things to accomplish. I believe in you and-" He stopped for a second. Julian's heart filling up with warmth as the words of the other player flooded out of his mouth. " And if you don't succeed here in Paris, you'll do it somewhere else. " His words were so genuine and it really was all that Julian ever wanted to hear from him. A tear actually slid past his lashes, on accident. " I believe in you and I love you. " He finished staring in Julian's dark irises.

He loved him. He loved him. He loved him. The words kept playing back endlessly in his mind. A bittersweet taste invaded in his mouth making it harder and harder to swallow. In a desperate attempt he pulled Presnel closer with the help of both of his hands gripping the defender's sides, as close as he could get. Then let his mouth latch on his teammate's. Gentle and quick. He pulled back almost immediately, realizing what he just did. He just kissed his friend. His hands slid down Presnel's waist quickly, his eyes wide, not even daring to throw a glance in Presnel's direction.

" I should head home. " Finally stuttered out Julian, his eyes still not leaving the floor were he glued them the second he had detached himself from Presnel. He had fucked up so bad.

" No! " Exclaimed Presnel almost too quickly, Julian's head jerked up to stare at Presnel with a puzzled look. " I mean, no. Can we- I mean- " Presnel stuttered in his turn. This was looking painfully awkward, which was the opposite of what Presnel ever was or stood for. " Just kiss me again. " Ultimately blurted out the French one tired to even find other words to align his thoughts.

So he did, Julian kissed him. He softly let his lips land on top of Presnel's while both of his hands were cupping his face. His body felt suddenly so warm that he could actually catch on fire. Presnel's hands found their way to Julian's waist, while their lips were still perfectly moving against each other's. He detached their lips after a while, only to peck the French's a few times. He could feel the small smile on Presnel's lips each time, which made his grow even wider. Kissing someone had never felt this good and Julian knew exactly why. Presnel wasn't just 'someone'. He was Presnel. And maybe in a couple of months they will be hundreds of kilometers away but that didn't matter now. Nothing else than both of them right here, right now, mattered.

 


End file.
